Sunday, July 3, 2011

Make The Decision

I find that my journey is no different from anyone who needs to lose weight. There is a moment in your life where you say “I need to change this.” I am overweight and it started with my pregnancy. I was laid off from a job where I was constantly active and on my feet then placed on bed rest for a portion of my pregnancy, and then it all went down hill from there. I would sit in bed not being very active at times and just eat whatever I felt like eating. Prior to my pregnancy and for the first few months of it I was exactly where I wanted to be weight wise and I had the nice flat stomach I absolutely loved. Here I am now, fifty pounds overweight and my son is almost two years old.

I have had friends that had children around the same time I did and within nine months had lost the weight just by no longer being pregnant. I attributed my inability to do so to genetics as my mother has had issues with her weight since giving birth to us and left it at that. It was when I began getting run down and having no energy to do anything and yet the will to want to that I knew there was something more going on so this took me to the doctor. He put together all my symptoms and we decided that taking a synthetic hormone could help my mood and it has, in some ways, though in others maybe I’m just not taking enough or what have you to alleviate everything. Some of my symptoms have gotten slightly better and others have not. There isn’t much of an exact science in this case and so figuring out the right dosage will have to be part of my journey as well.

My story isn’t unlike a lot of other women, but my path very much is. Since the birth of my son I have found a renewed strength in my faith. My religious beliefs are very alternative and are even alternative within the sub-sect that I practice within. As a Celtic Reconstructionist I practice a religious tradition that perhaps only a few hundred others do. While it fits into the larger scale of paganism my tradition is a minority within a minority. This has pushed me to “put my money where my mouth” is in regards to what I believe and practice. There is no one else to lead the way for my child so if I don’t set the example he will have no understanding of the tradition I put all of my heart and soul into.

In my tradition there are various different positions one can hold just as there were in the ancient times. Within the Celtic tradition one can be, amongst other things, a Bard, a Healer, a Druid or a Warrior. I am the later. Some could say it is by choice and in some ways it is, but for the most part, just like anything else in faith, my thriving to be a Warrior is a calling. As such it’s time to put my money where my mouth is and stop putting off the practice and training that I have always wanted or intended or sort of done before and I am hoping this public proclamation and documentation will keep me on that track. Sadly, I make this decision right at a time of celebration that usually involves lots of eating and drinking so while I am starting this blog now, the journey truly begins once everything calms down. To quote Lao-tzu, “A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step” so here it goes.

205 pounds

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